What gay sex is like

Mythbusting: What Gay Men Really Do In Bed

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Now here he was at the O2, seated among the commoners, with an opportunity to help deliver the Genesis story full-circle. Instead, he took the unselfish (if, let’s deal with it, slightly unsatisfying) route: avoiding the spotlight and letting his former bandmates enjoy the curtain dial they’d rightly earned. (“Me going was a rite of passage, really,” the singer told Mojo in 2023. “I’d been part of the creation of Genesis, so I wanted to be there at the end.”)

Here’s the thing, though: A lot of casual fans forget that Gabriel had already reunited with Genesis for an entire show—it just happened 20 years earlier. Oh, and it occurred not because of rosy nostalgia but due to mounting debt and death threats.

Gabriel staged the inaugural WOMAD (World of Music, Arts, and Dance) in July 1982, with the noble vision of sparking real cultural fusion. The three-day event featured British post-punk (Echo and the Bunnymen, Pigbag) and art-rock (Peter Hammill, Robert Fripp), traditional Irish folk (The Chieftains), Indian sitar players (Imrat Khan), Afro-Caribbean dance companies (Ekomé)—a legit

I often yearn for the simpler times before I came out of the ominous closet. Organism gay came to me easily when I was 15, because I wasn’t aware of the labels associated with what I felt back then. It was easy for my adolescent head to go through life with a sexual intent that was hardly met until I was allowed to move in a packed local train with men of all shapes and sizes. The early years of exploring your sexuality are ideally the most thrilling because you never know who in your vicinity is going to finish up becoming a random sexual experience.

One of my earliest experiences was chilling with my childhood buddy, playing video games, banging scorching wheels into each other, and borrowing 10 rupees from our parents to go surfing at a cyber cafe. There, at the age of 14, we would freefall into the murky backalleys of adv 2000s internet pornography – the sorts that even after you shut the browser, a pop-up of a female moaning kept returning on the desktop.

Before we got shunned from the local cyber cafes, we would take our half-hour surfing period to look at images of pink penises and vaginas and excitedly top to my friend’s place after to masturbate together. His mom wou

The ins and outs of safer, greater sex.

I’m scared of bottoming

Most gay men will consider bottoming at some day. However, the thought of doing it for the first day can be scary. Don’t allow that put you off.

You may prefer to douche before bottoming, especially if indulging in thick arse play like fisting or with large dicks/toys. Use plain, clean water, preferably at body temperature. Avoid using shower attachments - the water pressure can be dangerous. You can acquire douche bulbs online or from any good sex shop. Aim not to go overboard and irritate the lining of your arse, as this can craft you more vulnerable to STIs.

Get yourself relaxed with lots of foreplay like rimming or fingering. Some men do use amyl nitrate (poppers) to relax the muscles around their arse but there are two major health warnings. Poppers:

have been linked with an increased risk of HIV transmission
don’t mix with erection drugs like Viagra and may bring about a heart attack.

Deep breathing is far safer, helps you to relax and relaxes the arse too.

Find a position that suits the size, angle and curvature of your partner’s dick. Any position where your knees are bent and drawn into your chest, w

Life on the Bottom

I enjoyed a short-lived career on the bottom. My college boyfriend’s family lived in a duplex on Park Way, where we’d often slip away on weekends. Meals were rich and plentiful — foie gras, profiteroles, double magnums of Riesling, etc. — all of which I eagerly imbibed. Following one such decadent feast my freshman year, when we were still very much in the honeymoon phase of our first gay relationship, Dan and I retired to his bedroom and got to work. For weeks we’d been easing into penetration with me on the bottom, but the pain had proven prohibitive. Also at play was acute paranoia of involuntary defecation, something I’d been assured was a common, yet unwarranted, concern of bottoms.

Presumably though, most surveyed hadn’t recently gorged on three helpings of fattened goose liver. It’s unyielding to look someone in the eye after shitting their childhood bed — let alone date them for seven more years afterward — but that’s exactly what happened. What didn’t happen — and hasn’t since, really — was me back on the bottom.

• Read next: Bottoming Emojis, Explained

Maybe that’s why I’ve maintained an enviable respect for men and women who regularly get fucke