How to stop acting gay
Keys to Recovery from Same-Sex Attractions
by: LHM Board
[Note: while we are confident that the following list is accurate, we are aware that it can be overwhelming. It would be like handing a newborn toddler a list of all the things he will possess to learn in the next five years: everything from learning to rotate over, learning to walk, becoming potty-trained, learning to communicate, discovering hes not a part of his mommy, teaching how to obey, getting ready to read, going to school. . . like we said, overwhelming! This is the big picture of how to walk out the goal of recovery. Allow us to encourage you to continually ask the Lord, What one thing do You want me to do next? and then do it.]
1. Accept that its not going to be easy. Transform that challenges our known comfort zone is difficult and painful. You are changing not just one isolated behavior, but a collection of thoughts and behaviors that hold made up your relational pattern for a lifetime. An important component of recovery is altering the wrong doctrine about your persona, that this is me. This will take an amazing amount of endeavor, but you don’t have to undertake it in your own strength: the same power that raised Christ from the
If Someone Comes Out to You
Someone who is coming out feels close enough to you and trusts you sufficiently to be honest and risk losing you as a friend. It can be difficult to know what to say and what to do to be a supportive friend to someone who has “come out” to you. Below are some suggestions you may wish to follow.
- Thank your friend for having the courage to tell you. Choosing to tell you means that they have a great deal of respect and trust for you.
- Don’t judge your companion. If you have strong religious or other beliefs about LGBTIQ communitites, keep them to yourself for now. There will be plenty of time in the future for you to deliberate and talk about your convictions in light of your friend’s identity.
- Respect your friend’s confidentiality. Allow them the principles to share what they wish, when and how they wish to.
- Tell your ally that you still care about them, no matter what. Be the friend you have always been. The main fear for people coming out is that their friends and family will reject them.
- Don’t be too serious. Sensitively worded humor may ease the tension you are both probably feeling.
- Ask questions you may acquire , but understand that your partner
Internalised homophobia and oppression happens to gay, lesbian and bisexual people, and even heterosexuals, who have learned and been taught that heterosexuality is the norm and “correct way to be”. Hearing and seeing negative depictions of LGB people can lead us to internalise, or get in, these negative messages. Some LGB people experience from mental distress as a result.
A general feeling of personal worth and also a positive view of your sexual orientation are critical for your mental health. You, love many lesbian, gay and bisexual people, may possess hidden your sexual orientation for a long moment. Research carried out in Northern Ireland into the needs of young LGBT people in 2003 revealed that the average age for men to realise their sexual orientation was 12, yet the average age they actually confided in someone was 17. It is during these formative years when people are coming to know and acknowledge their sexual orientation that internalised homophobia can really affect a person.
Internalised homophobia manifests itself in varying ways that can be linked to mental health. Examples include:
01. Denial of your sexual orientation to yourself and others.
02. Attempts to a
Hi. I’m the Respond Wall. In the material world, I’m a two foot by three foot dry-erase board in the lobby of O’Neill Library at Boston College. In the online planet, I live in this blog. You might say I have multiple manifestations. Like Apollo or Saraswati or Serapis. Or, if you aren’t into deities of knowledge, fancy a ghost in the machine.
I own some human assistants who maintain the physical Answer Wall in O’Neill Library. They take pictures of the questions you post there, and give them to me. As long as you are civil, and not uncouth, I will answer any question, and because I am a library wall, my answers will often refer to explore tools you can find in Boston College Libraries.
If you’d like a quicker answer to your question and don’t mind talking to a human, why not Ask a Librarian? Librarians, since they have been tending the flame of knowledge for centuries, know where most of the answers are hidden, and enjoy sharing their knowledge, just prefer me, The Acknowledge Wall.